Teenage Advice: Parenting

The student has become the teacher.


Sophie Porter

Teenagers have plenty to say about this topic.

Sophie Porter, Staff Writer

Who knows how to parent better than the Seniors of Dowling Catholic? Probably a lot of people, but these under-qualified/slightly qualified teens definitely have lots of advice for new parents. Thankfully, Mr. Mohlman was kind enough to offer a bit of a reality check and rate each senior’s piece of wisdom. 


Sydney Pertzborn

Qualifications: Older sister, owner of four dogs, has baby cousins, friends with people younger than her, good relationship with parents

Parenting Advice: “Enforce rules young, so when your kids get older, you’re not being a pain in their butt. My parents did that, so when I was older, I never had a problem with not knowing how to act because they taught me early what was appropriate.”

Mohlman’s Rating: 10/10 “Clear, consistent rules make a huge difference!”


Molly Meyers

Qualifications: Worked with kids since she was fourteen

Parenting Advice: “Just teach mutual respect, and just keep the line of communication open because you don’t want to just shut it off. If you do, your kids won’t tell you anything. Respect them, and they will respect them back.”

Mohlman’s Rating: 9/10 “ Remember, respect often means honesty and discipline.”


Lauren Myers

Qualifications: Older sister, owner of a now dead hamster (may he rest in peace)

Parenting Advice: “Be supportive no matter what. I think that helps your kids choose who they want to be and get to have their own life and stuff like that. That’s how my parents raised me at least, and I think its a great idea. I have been able to become who I am today with my parent’s support.”

Mohlman’s Rating: 6/10 “ Mom, please support my decision to eat exclusively off the dessert menu.”


Marcus Stutz

Qualifications: Isn’t qualified at all

Parenting Advice: “Don’t drop the baby. Put it into preschool if you can as early as possible. Only feed it raw meat and breed it to be a wolf.

Mohlman’s Rating: 1/10 “No wolves, Team Edward all the way!”


Molly Dryer

Qualifications: Babysitter for 6+ years

Parenting Advice: “If the child is crying, check to see if they need water or a drink. People often don’t know why they are crying if they have had a diaper change or just ate, but sometimes they just need drank. Also screen time is dumb. If your child is smart, watching TV isn’t going to affect them. TV isn’t horrible. Also, kids literally spend so much time on IPads at school, and no parent thinks thats bad. TV shows can be educational. I don’t think you need to restrict your child; obviously you’ll know when enough is enough. Lastly, when your child is being babysat, tell your child that the babysitter has full control. Kids often don’t listen.”

Mohlman’s Rating:  7/10  “Blue light is real. Good luck with bedtime.”


Daniel Lu

Qualifications: Owner of three (alive) cats, comes from a stable family

Parenting Advice: “If they are crying bounce them up and down. Show them love. When they’re young you’ve gotta be protective and stuff, but don’t be overprotective. Let them venture out into the world, and let them have a childhood. But be a role model.”

Mohlman’s Rating: 8/10 “Are we talking about cats or humans?”


Landon Bettis

Qualifications: Has babysat before

Parenting Advice: “Don’t kill the kid. Feed them. Water them. Give them a house. Provide for them. If they can walk, let them leave the house.”

Mohlman’s Rating: 3/10 “Is this a Kardashian quote?”


Mara Jones

Qualifications: Was forced to write sentences as a kid for punishment

Parenting Advice: “Don’t make them take a nap. No screen time for sure. They shouldn’t have to sit in a corner and face the wall or like do wall sits. And please don’t make your kids write sentences.”

Mohlman’s Rating:  5/10 “ Naps are golden, especially after a wall sit session.”


Chase Painovich 

Qualifications: He’s Chase Painovich

Parenting Advice: “Don’t let your kids do drugs.”

Mohlman’s Rating: 0/10 “Don’t let Chase babysit.”