I’m sitting at the lunch table when one of my friends asks, “Addi, do you think I’m traumatized enough to go to therapy?” Pause. What? As someone who has gone to therapy for years and wants to be a therapist in the future, this is one of my most irate questions. Now don’t get me wrong, I don’t mind people asking me. What I’m angry about is that people think therapy is only for the “traumatized” or “mentally ill” when it’s not! Therapy is about helping one cope and adjust to every changing life. If you’ve ever thought about trying therapy but never been 100% on board, let me offer my perspective. 

According to Psychology.com, therapy is, “a form of treatment aimed at relieving emotional distress and mental health problems.” Those are some scary words. Treatment? Emotional distress? Mental health? Problems? You might think to yourself, “I’m not sick.” And, you might not be, but mental health is not just about illness or disease. According to the World Health Organization, mental health is, “a state of mental well-being that enables people to cope with the stresses of life, realize their abilities, learn well and work well, and contribute to their community.”

Our mental health affects our everyday life, as much or sometimes even more than our physical health does. It affects how we feel about ourselves as well as our ability to do the things we need and want to, including work, study, getting on with people, and looking after ourselves and others. Individual mental health is dependent on many things, including the famous nurture vs. nature debate. Every person deals with struggles with their mental health at some point; I promise it’s a normal thing, and therapy can help limit and teach someone how to navigate those challenges. Now, there are many kinds of therapy, but the most common and basic level is Psychotherapy—or talk therapy. It aims to help a person identify and change troubling emotions, thoughts, and behaviors (National Institution of Mental Health). 

But, why should you go to therapy? As  teenagers, we are constantly dealing with stress, whether that’s from parents, school, a part-time job, friends, or even social media. Studies have shown that adolescence is a time of heightened vulnerability to mental health challenges, with certain conditions manifesting or intensifying during this period. Teenage mental health is sometimes even trivialized, associating it as “part of growing up.” However, when ignored, mental health challenges can have profound implications on academic performance, social relationships, and overall quality of life (Compass Health Center). Saying that mental health is “normal” could make some feel like their issues are insignificant, when it’s anything but! It’s important to have a constant to help you work through these challenges before they progress. Therapy provides that constant.

You may be asking yourself, “Why do I need therapy when I can just talk to my friends?” Yes, having a strong support system of friends to lean on when you’re having a tough time is important, but they fill a different role than a therapist does. A trained mental health professional can provide a more specialized kind of support, especially if you are dealing with a mental health condition. First, a therapist is a specially trained professional taught to look for mental health conditions, warning signs, and emotional distress. Second, they are also bound by confidentiality. A therapist can’t share anything you tell them unless you are going to hurt yourself, hurt someone, someone is hurting you, or you give them specific permission. This includes your parents. Third, a therapist can help you focus on more complicated issues that need full attention. Many therapist can help teach mindfulness-based meditation, calming technics, and anti-anxiety emergency tools. Lastly, they are compassionate and understanding individuals that will be there if you need to talk and help you create a plan to make you feel better. 

I started seeing a therapist for the first time in third grade because I was struggling with anxiety at school. My parents decided to arrange biweekly sessions with someone from the same practice where my mom went. I don’t remember much about those sessions, except that I’d leave social studies class early, and we’d play a lot of games. At that age, it’s hard to grasp why you’re there. Eventually, I stopped seeing her. Fast forward to fifth grade, when my anxiety worsened, and my parents thought it would be helpful to start therapy again. And that worked for a while until the pandemic hit, and we had to pause in-person sessions as everything shifted online. My parents wanted me to continue virtually, but I didn’t feel comfortable with that, so I took a break. Around my freshman year of high school, we decided it was time to try therapy again. Since then, I’ve worked with four different therapists. While that might seem like a lot, finding the right fit can take time. Today, I see my therapist weekly. What started as a treatment for my anxiety has now become a stable outlet where I can talk regularly and feel heard. This has also led me to want to pursue a career in mental health, specifically looking to be an adolescent therapist.

For too long, people have looked at mental health and therapy as a bad thing. a stigma that keeps people who need therapy away from it. If someone hears their friends or family talking about how therapy is “bad,” “fake,” or “unneeded,” they might not receive the help they need. How do we break the stigma? First, understand the need for help! For some people, therapy is a crucial part of their livelihood or the stability they need to live. The easiest way is recognizing that needing help and taking action to get help shows strength and self-awareness! Therapy provides a safe space to explore thoughts and emotions, helping individuals gain insight into their mental health. By simply reading this very article, you are becoming more aware of the need! To keep learning, take a psychology or sociology class (good thing Dowling requires it), listen to your friends’ stories, or read articles from websites like the American Psychological Association or the National Institute of Mental Health about mental health disorders and treatment. Another way is encouraging a struggling friend to explore the idea of therapy. In a world that is moving forward in acceptance, it’s important to continue to spread awareness for mental health and the aid that comes with it. Working to de-stigmatize therapy is a win for everybody—struggling or not.

Therapy can be a hard adjustment, and it might take a while until you get what you need out of therapy, but it is all dependent on what you put into it. Luckily, as the need for therapy increases, so does the industry. Des Moines alone has hundreds of offices with plenty of therapists. As someone who has gone to therapy for a while, here are my best tips for getting the best experience:

1. 1. Finding the right therapist is essential for a successful therapy experience. Look for a provider who you trust, feel safe with, and can relate to. It’s important to feel comfortable discussing personal issues with your therapist to build a strong therapeutic relationship. When looking for a therapist keep in mind how you want therapy to go. Do you want to be in person or online? Are you specific in their qualifications and specialties? Are you more comfortable with a therapist of the same gender? What do you want to work on during sessions?
   2. Be open to the process. Keep an open mind and be patient with the therapy process. Progress takes time, and it’s important to trust the journey. Being open to new approaches and willing to explore different aspects of your mental health can lead to more effective outcomes. 
   3. Talk! Therapy doesn’t help if you don’t speak what’s on your mind. Remember, this person HAS to listen to you, it’s their job. The easiest way to progress is being honest. Make the most of your sessions!

I can’t stress enough about the need for therapy. I was lucky enough to grow up in a family that pushed me to seek mental health treatment, but I know not everyone is so fortunate. For someone seeking therapy, it might be hard to bring the idea up to their parents. Remember: asking for help is a strength, not a weakness. Every person deals with setbacks at some point in their life. According to Adolescent Wellness Academy, in 2019, one in five teenagers between the ages of 12 and 18 were dealing with some sort of diagnosable mental health condition. Since then,those number have risen. In 2023, 40% of teenagers were dealing with prolonged hopelessness or sadness (CDC). So, when going to your parents, be direct, and let them know how YOU’RE feeling. Asking to explore therapy or admitting the need for help is not an attack on them or their parenting. Tell them why you think therapy is the right fit for you and allow for it to be an open conversation.

Therapy is a powerful tool for anyone looking to improve their mental well-being, not just those facing major trauma or illness. It provides a safe space to navigate life’s challenges, whether it’s stress, anxiety, or simply the pressures of daily life. By breaking down the stigma surrounding therapy, we open the door for more people to seek help before their struggles escalate. Taking care of your mental health is just as important as taking care of your physical health, and reaching out for support shows strength not weakness. So, whether you’re dealing with big issues or just need someone to talk to, therapy can be a game-changer—and it’s time we all start seeing it that way.